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Think back to your school days. Who was the classmate you know who actually KNEW what they wanted to do with their life? And who was prepared to break away from what everyone else was doing in order to get on with their own project? (When then rest of us were just doing what was expected of us, hoping that one day our purpose in life would somehow be revealed to us).
It really doesn’t matter now whether or not that person was eventually successful in the direction they chose to take - what matters is that they gave life a go. Their experiences have made them a wiser person as a result. This is how self-loyalty works.
Self-loyalty means building on both the wisdom (and ignorance) of your past using the enthusiasm that drives you to embrace with passion the opportunities life is offering you. Remember: no outsider, however gifted, can ever tell you what those passions are – only your feelings can reveal them to you. You are a totally unique individual, so you can never be loyal to anyone else’s ideas of what you should be doing with your life. Being clear to what you are feeling is the key. Read more about this in our previous article: 10 ways to identify your feeling nature to live an illuminated life
Of course this does not mean you can ignore the social agreements needed when you live in densely settled communities: you still have to drive on the correct side of the road, stop at red traffic lights and pay our taxes. Plus there are many social conventions that have been promoted by the various religions about moderating and disciplining our behaviour so you don’t cause undue harm to others in our community. But within these considerations you must retain the freedom to pursue our own learnings and endeavours otherwise you may risk leading a spiritually stagnant life devoid of joy and fulfilment.
Here are 8 ways to be exercise self-loyalty:
Stop catering! Stop being nice unless you really mean it. It’s better to say nothing than to say something you don’t really believe. Anger can be turned into “tough love”, and will (eventually) earn respect. In the meantime, search out something you can feel gratitude for and express it. Balance your criticisms with gratitude, and you will not undermine your message that change is needed.
Consider your daily routines and habits. Sort them into categories
Time is our most precious commodity: to live a joyful, fulfilling life you need to spend our time wisely. What gives you thrills, satisfaction, expansive feelings, contentment?
Families, loved ones and relationships do require part of my time, both for their benefit and mine. They want to hear from me my wisdom on whatever they are dealing with, and I need to outflow to someone whatever it is I am learning about to make it real for me. But they mustn’t be allowed to consume excessive amounts of my time, depriving me of the time I need for my own continuing growth. Start looking at family relationships as a business - meaning give-and-take on both sides rather than sacrifice and martyrdom.
Parties, television, social media can be great opportunities for personal expansion as you share your life with others and are stimulated by the wisdom of others, but they can also (with perilous ease) become massive drains on your energy if you take on their confused ideas. Keep asking yourself “what if anything am I getting out of this?”, and don’t hesitate to leave if the answer is nothing.
Don’t interfere with the learning experiences of others. “Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do (and when it needs to be finished) and they will surprise you with their ingenuity” – George Smith Patton. And from Francisco Coll: “Each soul has come to learn certain lessons for himself. If you interfere with his learning, he will just have to recreate the same situation to learn from.” In other words, mind your own business. Don’t take on other people’s problems without a very good reason.
Respect yourself (and teach your children to do the same). Respect your time and how you spend it. Respect your body and give it what it needs to stay healthy, alert and active. Respect others in your community. Offer them smiles, gratitude and encouragement. Always discern: look for the positive qualities in every situation and cut your energy from any negative influences.
Follow through with action that produces real change and see that change reverberate through your environment.
You are all on a trajectory of spiritual growth or you would not be on this planet. You all learning to become, once again, an angelic type of being radiating love and understanding wherever you go. Patient persistence will eventually get you there! And in the meantime, you need only concentrate on creating the best version of yourself possible.
What can you do now?
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