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Turning Anger into Love – Why Love Matters
By Kristy Kaye
We live in a time when the truth is a disputed entity, and our world is awash in an ocean of denialism, gaslighting and conspiracy theories.
Is it any wonder that we clutch at any straw that comes along that seems to offer us some stability and certainty? For some, that means clinging ever harder to our long-held prejudices and opinions.
But we really need to ask and meditate on whether that is working? Socially, our planet is fast approaching rock bottom. Anger and frustration are rampant as disease, pestilence and social division destroy the principles and institutions that have long preserved our way of life.
For some, the response will be a political revolution; for others, it will be apathy and indifference. Neither response involves discernment.
A Return to Meaning and Love
Unable to resolve society’s lack of moral direction and confined by lockdown, many of us have undergone fundamental shifts in our priorities in life. Lockdown has been a perfect opportunity to turn our backs on the outside world and re-discover what is actually important and meaningful to us.
Caring for our immediate family, getting to know our neighbours and neighbourhoods again, tidying our environment, pursuing personal projects, home cooking, home gardening and homeschooling have all helped turn our focus away from being just someone with a job title and back towards the uniqueness of us as an individual, and the importance of our relationships with others around us. Through this, the doorway to love has started to open again.
By searching for activities that will fulfil us, we are re-awakening our own sense of purpose and wellbeing: our self-love. Inevitably we will discover that the key to all fulfilment is summed up by that one word: LOVE.
Love..... What can anyone say about that word that hasn’t already been told by poets and songwriters and authors and philosophers down through the ages?
And as I write these words, my Twitter feed springs up with two quotes:
From the Dalai Lama: ”Love is the absence of judgment”
And from the Indian guru Sadhguru: “There is really no such thing as conditional love and unconditional love – there are conditions, and there is love.”
The Ultimate Goal
Clearly, (and every spiritual leader bears this out), unconditional love is the ultimate goal in our spiritual journey. And because we are all on our spiritual journey, whether we realise it or not, we can ask the question: “What is it that’s stopping me from living unconditional love?” And how can I begin to change this?
All spiritual growth begins with an examination of you. What is your attitude to yourself? Kristy Kaye writes, “ Our first opportunity is to heal our past. This is our purpose. We may wonder what there is to heal. The answer to this will be in your early years. What were you unhappy about? … [ask yourself] What do I love and hate about planet Earth?... How does this symbolically relate to me? When you have the answers, you will know what you need to heal within.”
As long as you harbour anger and resentment inside yourself, you will have a firm list of reasons to withhold your love in certain circumstances. These “reasons” are just your opinions. They are the judgments that allow your emotions and your intellect to deny love. All your ‘likes’ and ‘dislikes’ can become excuses to withhold love, to make your love conditional. You may have learned these habits from your parents – did you? You have the power now to change those attitudes forever.
Remember: “Love is the absence of judgment”
What is Love?
Love is who we are as a soul - it is the light that radiates from us when we are truly living who we are. Love is the divine (or Universal) energy that feeds our soul - that makes plants grow, that heals misunderstandings, that keeps us healthy, that drives us to be alive and pursuing our soul’s purpose for living.
As we lose our judgments, we cannot help but be love because love is who we really are. Without judgment to impede it, love flows naturally through us to everything we encounter.
Of course, love has countless ways of expressing itself. “Falling in love” is just one narrow example. Greeting a stranger you pass on the street is love.
Nurturing a child, a plant or a puppy is love. Reprimanding someone can also be love (“tough love”). The key is that you are helping someone to grow. (That ‘someone’ maybe you.)
Clearing Our Pathway to Love
We have to learn to replace judgment with discernment. Instead of following our ingrained triggers of judgment, our spiritual training leads us to be detached, clear-minded and unemotional. Then we can honestly appraise the facts of the situation that faces us and allow our inner knowing, our inner truth, to guide us to the most appropriate - the most loving - response. For it is only our judgments that stand between us and that radiant angel of love who lies mostly dormant within us!
It should be apparent now that our spiritual growth is largely a matter of demolishing the frameworks of judgments and opinions we have accumulated over our many lifetimes.
Naturally, this is no overnight task; but the journey of thousand miles begins with a single step!
Living Illumination presents many, many courses that are available online to help us understand and heal our judgmental habits.
Nine times out of ten, our judgments are a strategy we use to avoid facing up to something we are afraid of. At some stage in our past, we experienced an event that we still don’t understand:- an event that was upsetting or devastating to us somehow. It has left a scar in our aura: a hole or a tear that we believe we have to protect. Something too ghastly to even look at again! Or so we believe (and may have believed for a very long time).
We have allowed our wounds to be so covered up by barnacles that we don’t believe we will or can ever address it again.
The truth, however, is that we can address it, and we can heal it very quickly. We just have to allow ourselves to establish a trusting relationship with our loving guidance, then allow them to gently guide us firstly to the origin of the experience and then to a bigger understanding of the truth of the situation.
Then, as our fears drop away, we experience an extraordinary rebound in our energy. Peace is restored. Our love for ourselves expands. Our love for others increases. Our joy in life returns, and gradually we become again who we always really were – an angel of love!
Courses to Watch For
The first step always is the Business of Life Workshop, where you will be connected to your loving guidance. The second one to watch for is The Anger Workshop. Keep these on your radar, and don’t hesitate. The world needs you.
Reach out through our website www.livingillumination.com or by connecting with us in person.
What can you do now?
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